France: Rude. America: Lame. British: Boring.
May 23, 2006
It’s not just the American Right that hates France: Apparently, the British do, too. According to a recent survey, the French are the “rudest and most boring” nation. OK, I get it. “France is a miserable country because it’s populated by Frenchmen, and Frenchmen are miserable because they live in France,” or so claimed Samuel Clemens. Seriously, the whole Metro system in Paris emits a constant stale fart smell. But its the best way to get around town quickly. Their food is awesome, however, with many regional variations and specialties, and the girls in the south of France rival those of just about anywhere in the world. NB - I’m an admitted francophile, so I’m perhaps a little biased.
But there is a silver lining: The British are unequivocally average in every way. That is, unless you’ve ever encounted a British “Stag-party” while vacationing in Europe. I know Americans have the reputation of being obnoxious, but the Limeys take the cake in the “alcohol-induced-total-boorishness” category, hands down. They also score big in the “girls-who-pretend-to-be-interested- in-you-until-they-find-out-you-don’t-have-any-Ecstasy” category.
The survey also concludes that Americans have no sense of style and lousy cuisine. Well, what? You mean, cookie-cutter “Australio-Gaelic-Tex-Mex” restaurants on every corner (think: Texas Roadhouse, Bennigans, Fridays, Outback, ad nauseum) doesn’t qualify as haut-cuisine? And innumerable cookie-cutter tweens boutiques (American Eagle, Abercrombie, Hollister, Aeropostale, Gap, Banana Republic) aren’t universally en vogue? Tennis-shoes and khakis is not a good look?
Well, this is all news to me.
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Go into any southern meat and three and then complain about American food. I can’t argue about fashion, but I do know that I HATE goucho pants.
No big surprise that the Brits hate the French.
You’re too hard on American culture. This is the issue Mencken got wrong, at least to me.
I think there’s certainly an “American Culture,” although it’s much harder to define, as opposed to say, the French “culture” or the German “Kultur.” (forgive me if my Deutsch is not up to par.)
But I stand by my Applebee’s/Friday’s/Abercrombie comments. Everything has this tendency towards bland homogeneity, and that’s no fun at all.
Hardly. Been to Berlin lately? Count the Starbucks.
As for bland homogeneity: we invented jazz, and until recently nobody else is any damn good at it, although Europeans try like hell (although lately I’ve heard just amazing jazz in Hong Kong and, of all places, Ramallah.) Our writers for a long time kicked everybody’s ass — America in the 30’s really set the tune for everyone else and even now men like DeLillo or Auster have few (though some) foreign parallels, and America has led in many other artistic endeavors too.
There’s a market, and there’s a lot of bland crap out there, but it is unfair to label it as necessarily low culture and where I see equivalent cultural expression — say Iranian filmmakers right now, or Japanese writers — it actually ain’t in Europe.